Confessions of a "dangerous" girl

Confession time. I have been seeing more of Danny. I like him. I don't like him in a long-term potential husband kind of way, I like him as in he is a fun and interesting guy who I enjoy spending time with, despite his eccentricities and paranoid behavior. And with my very best Chi-friend relocating at True Love's request to the West Coast, I am in desperate need of at least someone on my social calendar.

Danny from the beginning has been very upfront that he is a loner and is really not a one-woman man or a "relationship" guy. Alright now, calm down, I am not going into this thinking I can or want to change him, I am going into this purely for friendship and you guessed it, benefits. Social benefits (get your heads out of the gutter!) And there haven't even been any other benefits at all outside of little pet kisses and neck nibbling. Danny is being extremely patient and obliging and letting us take things at my pace. Its nice that he is not being manipulative or assumptive, just patient. How strange!

Now, I know that there are not many reasons for me to like him, very few in fact. But in the same respect, I feel like there are very few reasons for him to like me. As I said he is somewhat of an intellectual--he has a lot of opinions but only about things that he has studied and researched, which is a lot of weird things. His brain works in such a strange, inexplicable way and his articulation often leaves me in the dark. It is very intriguing.

So I asked him last night what it is that he likes about me? From everything he says, I kind of feel like I should be the last person he would like...I consider myself naive, oblivious, uninformed, innocent, shy, complacent, and private. Especially around certain types of people, I take on a kind of quiet wall-flower persona. Almost like I am afraid to say what I think in case it paints me in a negative or unattractive light. Like I am protecting myself from judgement by not putting anything out there to be judged. Very backwards I realize, and the truth is that I am reasonably smart and informed, and I can even be articulate at times. But it is my fear of rejection that keeps me quiet.

Danny is very complimentary and he told me he likes me because I am "hot", endearing, and there is a loneliness to me that felt kindred to him. He also likes that I am not desperate, I don't need people, I like them but I don't need them. And, he is very good at the backhanded compliments, by the way. Like how he likes my eyes but thinks they have some "evil" in them. In fact, he said that from the first time he met me he feels like something bad is going to happen to him because of me...he can't quite put his finger on what it will be, but its a feeling. Part of his paranoia I'm sure is obsessing about intuition and prediction. Obviously I don't know what the hell he is talking about, but it is intriguing. And he doesn't say things to be mean or scary, he just says them. And remember, I only catch probably 60% of his actual message or meaning...my inference can therefor be slightly skewed.

Alright that's my confession. I like crazy, vampire Danny. He likes me.

Now, obviously I would drop Danny in one hot minute if it meant having a real relationship with an average guy like Vegas. Vegas and I had a great date, but I will be cautiously skeptical as a result of my dating history...good, successful and average guys usually don't like me, and to be fair, its not like I am ever head-over-heals for them either, but as I said, I am all in and I am putting my best legs forward.